anywhoo.. this is all to say that afterwards my friend julia and i took the kiddos to the nearby park for some quick swing action.. apparently every parent and nanny from our sing-a-long had the same brilliant idea and swings were taken so we sat awkwardly in the middle of the playground chatting while trying to keep the littles entertained without licking the tarmac.. julia and i got onto the subject of how big they were getting, how crazy it is this first year.. and when do we plan on having the next little ones, should we be so lucky.. ugh what a loaded question, eh? when i think about me and you and you and me i think -- oh, right away! lets make m a best friend.. but there is the other side, i like that i can focus on milo now, that he has all of me. that when he does something new i am watching it, that he is first on my mind.. there are good sides to having that not be the case, sure, but im not sure that i want things to happen so quickly that i can't soak in this unique time with my one and only. and though i can't imagine loving another baby remotely close to how i love m.. i can't imagine it.. i also know that all moms feel that way and according to our, very loving and devoted mum "your love just grows" so i will trust in that..
so it got me thinking that i should make a list for the next go-around, of the things i would want to tell myself.. here goes:
-you will probably have nursing issues again, unless you have a champion sucker who doesn't mind that mama's boobies resemble mountains with a tick tack on top.. if thats the case, you can stop reading now, but if you are knee-deep in nipple shields, spoon feeding, sores, poor latches and tears; give that babe a bottle. you were so afraid of giving m a bottle at first but really - your commitment to breastfeeding is strong but you have to give yourself a break.. m was able to latch because he got bigger, he got it. keep trying and keep at it but dont spend your days crying over it. it will get good again.
-don't invite everyone you know to the hospital and/or the apartment the first two weeks. give yourself and the hubs and the babies some time to adjust and to recover together. don't feel the great need to just 'be yourself' a day after giving birth - its huge and you will never quite be yourself again. give your family some time to be together without dishes and deep conversation. breath it in.
-try not to spend all of your time on your phone while you are nursing/babe is sleeping on you.. thats not to say that its bad to read a novel during those marathon nursing sessions or to dull your mind from the fact that your limbs have fallen asleep due to the little ones positioning - but - there is something to be said about being in the present.
-ask for help. take help. dont be humble about it. you will give it back.
-trust in your body that it will get back to where it needs to be. don't feel bad that the water weight is making you look like the hulk.. go with it.. mu-mu it out and don't think twice.
-if you have decided to do a hospital birth and you are in your labor room and its hurting real bad.. get that epidural. stat.
i'm sure in the next few weeks i'll have more to add to this list, but i wanted to get it out while it was still lingering in my head..
**and don't feel bad when certain people tell you not to let the little sleep on you.. because one day they wont and you will ache for it.
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